The Phone Book Plague

It wasn't too long ago when we used to get a telephone directory from our local telephone company. Apparently those days are gone forever. It seems like almost every Sunday I find a new telephone book on my front sidewalk either in a plastic bag or covered with plastic. I made a point to look at these phonebooks and compare them.

Some are large and some are small and I suppose they are all useful. My wonder how it is possible for all the people listed in the Yellow Pages to pay for advertising in all these books. It seems like those listed in the Yellow Pages of most of the books are quite similar. But there is far more in these books then Yellow Pages. As I look at the white pages I see that they are quite exact copies of the white pages on the Internet. The other day I talked to my computer repairman and he said he was not listed in any of the phonebooks although he did not ask for an unlisted number. He gave me his business card which had his number on it but advised me like could not find it in the phone book. I found out that was true it was not in any of the pages in any of the phonebooks or on the Internet. It seems like that when there is an error every one of the phonebooks has the same error.

One of them I received last week with the Verizon Yellow Pages is about 8 1/2" by 10 1/2". That is not too bad except in the middle of the book there are 210 pages of coupons, each of which I assume was made for by the individual advertisers. Especially highlighted are 21 pages of advertising by attorneys in the Yellow Pages section. The next highlighted section is 37 pages of advertising by dentists. The next highlighted section consists of about 13 pages of advertising for restaurants.

Then when I looked at the white pages I found that the numbers were four columns to a page. For a geezer like me it is impossible to look up a number without either bifocals or a magnifying glass.

Another directory starts out with 128 pages of community information before the white pages begin. But the white pages only have three columns to the page and I actually can read those without my bifocals or a magnifying glass.

This directory has an interesting feature called a numerical cross reference guide on which there are 63 pages where you can look up a number and it will tell you the name on the listing. Of course this only applies to the numbers published in this directory. But it is a handy feature if you have a magnifying glass because the numbers are printed 11 columns to the page. It has a special restaurant section and a wedding section before you get to the regular Yellow Pages.

The directory I am most likely to use is only 9" x 6.5" and about the same thickness as the other directories, but the white pages are only three columns to the page and the numbers are in big enough print that I can read them without any assistance. It also has a reverse directory with eight columns to the page and is difficult to read without glasses. It also has many maps of the area and the Yellow Pages while not as extensive or specialized as the other directories are in bigger print.

I have several other directories that I could describe. However I have come to some conclusions. The bigger thicker directories apparently have better salespeople to get all these people and companies to advertise in them. The one I'll most value to me is the smallest one of them. The problem with it is that it was delivered on a Sunday afternoon, left on my sidewalk in a plastic wrap. It was well sprinkled by my long system by the time I brought it in. When I first saw it I thought I should perhaps put it straight in the garbage because it was swollen with water. One of the companies who delivered a directory called me on the telephone to see if I had received their directory. I guess they were checking up on their delivery person but it was also delivered to my sidewalk on a Sunday.

I think I liked it better when the local phone company printed their own directory and delivered it to my front porch. They knew how many telephone jacks I had in the house and would deliver a number of directories so that I could have one by each telephone. I can still have one by each telephone but each one of them are different and some of them are so thick and full of garbage that I am unlikely to use them as long as I can get the information I want from the Internet.

That brings up another thing that I wanted to talk about. There is a frequent advertisement on the television about how handy DEX is and how easy it is to get information about almost anything by using it on the Internet. I have tried it and believe me the advertisements are not 100% accurate. I have a 1991 Mazda Miata that needs a new clutch. I used the Internet to try to find the most appropriate and least expensive way to get these repairs. I've found lots of them and it appears that this program merely regurgitates the same advertising that is in the Yellow Pages. It seems that the more you spend on advertising the better the recommendation is. I suppose that is true of all kinds of advertising but I have a feeling that the person who spends the most on advertising may not be the right one to hire. Draw your own conclusions.